What’s inside the Google Bus?

The magical white monstrosity that you see barreling down Hayes Street in San Francisco towards the sunrise and beyond is a special bus. One you won’t find anywhere else. One that’s on its way to change the world. This bus, my friends, is transporting precious cargo: the minds of the future. Behold the GOOGLE bus.

How do I know for sure with its lack of corporate signage, tinted windows, and only a small Mountain View header? I just do.

We’ve all heard the rumors about what’s on board: a Blue Bottle barista siphon-brewing organic fair trade single origin beans sustainably farmed in Guatamala; an attractive blond masseuse specializing in deep tissue and shiatsu; an elliptical machine and resistance bands supervised by a licensed yogalates instructor; master som and mixologist (return journeys only); business-class-style turndown service for napping; and feature length films available in IMAX 3D or widescreen. All that in addition to WiFi (obviously), server access for uninterruped monitoring of the zero-world problem thread; personal entertainment pods; unlimited supplies of Red Bull; and plenty of spare hoodies and messenger bags.

Can anyone out there (a Google VIP, perhaps?) confirm these on-board amenities? Or add to this list?  We’re dying to know…